WrestleMania XXX Predictions

It’s a yearly tradition around these parts for me to make my ‘Mania predictions. And since I totally spaced it this past Thursday, I figure I may as well make up for it by writing up something as quickly as I can.

So… I apologize that this will be a bit half-assed.

But I suppose it’s time to get this party started, right? YEAH DUDE!

Vickie Guerrero Diva's Championship Invitational
Vickie Guerrero Diva’s Championship Invitational

Here’s one of the two matches that are total clusters that really don’t need anyone to predict who will win. Any one of the ladies could get the nod and come out of this on top.
PREDICTION: I’d hope for AJ Lee to retain. While I don’t see it happening, that’s as close of a prediction as you’re going to get, I’m afraid.

The Andre the Giant Memorial Battle Royal
The Andre the Giant Memorial Battle Royal

And here’s the second. Again, anyone could get the nod with the win here. Lots of these guys deserve a win here that could help boost their career. The real big swing is the fact that three more people have yet to be added.
PREDICTION: I’ll do this. Right now, out of those that are announced to be in the match Big E would probably be the most logical candidate to win. And this is more hopeful than anything else, but I’m leaving room in my heart for a CM Punk return and win. Ha ha. Funny joke I made there.

The Shield vs. Kane and The New Age Outlaws
The Shield vs. Kane and The New Age Outlaws

I love that the Outlaws have gotten another run. They’re still as good as they ever were. I’m a bit disappointed in their heel turn. But it makes a lot of sense. I’ve never really been that high on The Shield. But they’ve been impressing even me more and more recently as well.
PREDICTION: I really think this will be where The Shield finally breaks up. They’ve been teasing it for months now, and honestly, this is really the only place to have a WrestleMania-sized “shocker.” Given that prediction within a prediction, I guess I have to go with Kane and The New Age Outlaws.

Four-Way Tag Title Match
Four-Way Tag Title Match

I’m not sure why this match, which is, obviously, taking place during the pre-show, is listed higher on the card than some of the others. Either way. And I suppose this too is a bit of a cluster that could go either and any way.
PREDICTION: I’m going to go with The Real Americans. Just on the principle of the matter. But most likely, Usos retain. Hell, I wouldn’t mind seeing Rybaxel win either. In other words, I just hope to God that Los Matadores stay far, far away from victory. But that’s just me, apparently.

John Cena vs. Bray Wyatt
John Cena vs. Bray Wyatt

This is the only, real, TRUE toss-up on the show. And honestly, I’m really, REALLY looking forward to it. Had they not added the story of John Cena defending his legacy, I would say this is Bray’s match. Hands down. But they made this match focus on Cena defending his legacy. And Bray’s the evil monster that wants to destroy it.
PREDICTION: I guess I still have to go with Bray Wyatt. He needs a good rub. He’s had a few, but beating Cena will cement him as one of their top guys of the future that they’re trying to build him up as being. And I mean, all the times I’ve said, “they’re never going to make Cena lose,” in the past two or three years, I’ve been wrong.

The Undertaker vs. Brock Lesnar
The Undertaker vs. Brock Lesnar

From any kind of stand point you want to take this, this one’s not even close. We’ll just leave it at that.
PREDICTION: The Undertaker will win. Every emotional false finish in this match will just be forced crap. There is no reason for ‘E to put Lesnar over here. At all. That being said, it will still be a great match. Probably.

Daniel Bryan vs. Triple H
Daniel Bryan vs. Triple H

And here’s the match that I’m most looking forward to. Hell, everyone should be looking forward to this match the most. Most have been complaining that this match shouldn’t even be here. Bryan should have been added to the main event right away. All of those things. For me, I always took the stance that Bryan/Triple H NEEDED to have a match for there to be a sense of closure to the story that’s lasted since SummerSlam.
PREDICTION: ‘E’s been smart. They milked this Bryan cash cow for every drop of copper it was worth. And all of mine and everyone else’s prior complaints aside, they’ve really turned this into something special. Therefor, Daniel Bryan is obviously winning here. If he doesn’t there most certainly will be a riot in New Orleans involving 75,000 people. It’ll be 9/11, the wrestling version.

Randy Orton vs. Daniel Bryan vs. Batista
Randy Orton vs. Daniel Bryan vs. Batista

Make no mistake about it. That is how this match is being built. While it would be kind of cool to see the three guys from Evolution in a match like this, it’s not going to happen. If they wanted to even try to get me to believe, for even a brief moment, that Triple H would have a shot of being in this match, that’s how they would have built up his part in it. They didn’t. Bryan’s in. No doubts. Oh yeah, there’s two other people in the match too.
PREDICTION: Daniel Bryan. Obviously. There is no way that WrestleMania XXX doesn’t close with images reminiscent of X’s Bret Hart being hoisted up on the locker room’s shoulders with the strap in his hand. Or XX’s image of Chris Benoit and Eddie Guerrero celebrating their main event victories. If ‘Mania isn’t capped with a seemingly nostalgic ending, the outcome will remain the same with the aforementioned riot. WWE knows this.

OVERALL: What was looking to be one of the worst WrestleMania’s in history just a month or two ago, in my mind, has shaped up to be one of the greatest. I said something close to this during my predictions rambling of WrestleMania XXVIII — for the past, nearly 10 years (XXVIII being an obvious exclusion), there’s only been one match to look forward to on the card. This time, I’m looking forward to five. FIVE. That’s unheard of these days.

To put it simply, we are just four hours away from something awesome. I hope you’re as pumped up for it as I am.

Signed,
Your humble servant.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *